Careless Blue
by silent moon1
Summary: A period Serena-Darien romance about childhood friends and forbidden lovers.
1. Chapter 1

Careless Blue  
Chapter 1  
  
Author: Silent Moon  
e-mail: silentmoonstar@yahoo.com  
Rated: R  
Genre: Romance/Alt. Reality  
Disclaimer: standard  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
moon beauty to live and to love  
in delirious bitter gardens  
the vision floods under the mind sky  
night breaths, whispering symphony  
love light relieves  
kirsty hawkshaw  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
  
Mud. She was covered in mud. That was what he remembered most vividly later.  
Head to toe, hair hands and toes...all covered in caked-on mud.  
  
The carriage pulled through the gate and two of the maids dragged her kicking and  
screaming out. They spotted him and let out relieved sighs,   
"Darien, thank the heavens...here, take her and make her wash."  
  
He had stared incredulously at them. Had he heard correctly?  
"You want me to wash THAT?" He'd asked skeptically.  
  
The two maids had laughed as they thrust the thrashing, muddy creature at him,  
"She's just a girl--and you're a strong lad. Go on."  
  
And so, she was the first girl he ever had in his arms--and he the first man  
to touch her. And it was NOT pleasant.   
  
She was loud and rough and very very muddy.   
  
"Put me down this instant BOY! I will NOT be washed!!" She'd hollared violently.  
  
"Why is she here?" Darien had asked as he held her easily over one shoulder, trying  
not to get kicked in the face.   
  
One of the maids turned wearily to him, "She's to be the Count's next wife--once  
we clean her up."  
  
At this the girl shouted violently, "I shall be NO ONE'S WIFE! I'm only fifteen!"  
  
The maid shrugged, "No matter, once you're sixteen he will marry you and that will give  
us time to work on your atrocious manners! You should count yourself lucky, this is  
a far better fate than the one you were heading for."  
  
He felt her stiffen, then return once again to shouting, "Put me DOWN boy!!!!"  
  
The maids shooed him off to the tub.   
  
And so he carted the young girl down the halls to the bath, "I'm fifteen too." He  
informed her between shouts.   
  
"Am I supposed to care what age you are boy? Put me down!!!"  
  
This time he obeyed as he dumped her into the tub and held her there.  
  
"I do NOT wish to be washed." She informed him, "I am perfectly happy being dirty!"  
  
He almost laughed at that, "I HAVE to wash you, so hold still!"  
  
He scrubbed her face as she tried valiantly to pull away. Then he pulled her  
sopping rag of a dress over her head and she squealed in protest, ducking under  
the water.  
  
"You aren't allowed to see me boy!"  
  
"Stop calling me boy!" He blurted back, "And come up so I can wash you GIRL!" He  
returned with a smirk.  
  
She frowned as he forcefully pulled her up to scrub her shoulders and arms.  
  
"Further, I have to make sure you're quite clean." He lectured.  
  
"No!"  
  
"Yes!" He pulled her rather violently and tumbled over backwards so she landed on top  
of him, naked.   
  
She opened her mouth to scream when suddenly he hollared instead, looking down at her  
gently rounded chest pressed against him, "Y-you're not a girl!!!" He cried, throwing  
her off him and backing away--eyes wide as saucers.  
  
"You said you were just a girl!" He yelled desperately and then turned to look away,  
thoroughly humiliated at seeing her naked when she was a woman.  
  
She stood there a moment, trying vainly to cover herself and then her temper returned,  
"I TOLD you to leave me be!" She scolded and watched him frown angrily.  
  
"How was I to know?" He shot back.  
  
Suddenly a rather cold draft blew in and he knew--without looking--that she shivered.  
  
"I-Is there a blanket I may use?" She said, her teeth beginning to chatter.  
  
He did his best to stumble over to it without looking at her and finally gave up utterly.  
  
"Oh for--well it's too late, now I know what you look like so it doesn't matter!"  
  
He gathered up the blanket and wrapped it carefully around her. And it was then he noticed,  
with her long golden hair loose and wet down her back, and her skin free of mud, that she  
had startling blue eyes.  
  
"You're actually very pretty." He smiled kindly, "Under all that mud."  
  
She scowled and stuck out her tongue, "So? I prefer mud!"  
  
He laughed good naturedly and she couldn't help but smile at him over it.  
  
"Who are you?" She asked cautiously.  
  
"Darien." He said, smiling at her, "Darien Chiba. The Count is my God Father."  
  
"Oh." She returned softly.  
  
He looked at her expectantly, "And you are..??" He finally asked.  
  
She frowned, "None of your business!"  
  
"I told you my name!"  
  
"That doesn't mean I have to tell you mine!" She said and stuck out her tongue.  
  
His eyes narrowed, "You had better tell me or I'll think up a dreadful name for you  
and call you by it FOREVER!!!" He threatened.  
  
She turned haughtily away and stared sullenly at the wall a long moment,  
"Call me whatever you want."   
  
And there was something almost hurting in her tone that made him stop from calling  
her 'Mud-girl' for all eternity.  
  
Instead he turned her round slowly. He regarded her stubborn, sad face and looked  
thoughtful a moment, "Blue. You have blue eyes so I shall call you blue."  
  
He smiled, "Careless Blue...."  
  
She looked at him strangely, "That's not a name!"  
  
He frowned again, "It certainly is! I say so!"  
  
"That doesn't make it a name!"  
  
"Then I'll call you MUD GIRL!!!!"  
  
"That's even worse!"  
  
"So, take your pick!"  
  
He caught her by the shoulders as he said it and his strength frightened her a moment.  
She stared into his eyes, "Fine," She conceded, "Blue it is."  
  
He smiled, "Good. Well then Blue--how came you to be here?"  
  
Her face darkened, "None of your business!"  
  
He let go of her so suddenly she nearly fell.  
  
"Stop saying that!!!"  
  
"I can say whatever I please!"  
  
"No you can't!"  
  
She shoved him, "Yes I CAN!"  
  
He stumbled backwards in surprise, before running at her as she screamed.  
He threw her over his shoulder again, tore off the blanket and threw her back  
in the tub with a splash.  
  
"How dare you!" She screamed.  
  
"You deserved it!" He informed her.  
  
She splashed him with the muddy water, right in the face, "Take that!"  
  
He reached over, grabbed her by the shoulders and dunked her, "Take THAT!" He returned.  
  
Now she jumped out of the tub and tackled him to the ground--and this time he wasn't   
embarassed. In fact he was furious as she pushed his face down with her hands, yelling  
at him.  
  
"Get off me!" He managed through the muffled smudge of his mouth.  
  
"Never!" She hollared in triumph.  
  
"WHAT IS GOING ON HERE???" The older Maids voice cut in making them both stop and   
turn to stare at her.  
  
They both pointed at the other, "It's his/her fault!"  
  
The Maid frowned, stomping over and grabbing her by the arm, "Come along girl!"  
She pulled her towards the door as 'Blue' made one last face at Darien.  
  
He stuck out his tongue in reply and then smiled. What a lively girl! He'd never  
be bored again!  
  
"At least you're washed..." The Maid muttered as she threw another blanket around  
the skinny, pale-skinned creature.  
  
She managed to wriggle the squirming girl into a dress and brush out her hair before  
she tore down the hall and out the door, sprinting across the field without stopping.  
  
Darien watched her go as the Maid stood panting in the door, brush still in hand.  
He walked over to her, "Why is she here?"  
  
The Maid looked at him then, "Her parents are dead. The Count saw her at a party  
they held some weeks ago and asked for her hand--but they said no. She was still  
too young to marry, but with them gone she had no place to go. She was living like  
a wild animal when we picked her up--working in the fields of her family's farm  
as though it would do any good--poor lass."  
  
She put a hand on Darien's shoulder, "Maybe you can comfort her."  
  
Darien nodded thoughtfully before heading out after her. He found her sitting in  
the grass staring out over the hill top to the skyline. She was biting her lip to  
keep from crying.  
  
"Do you want to tell me now?"  
  
"Tell you what?" She bit out harshly.  
  
"How you came to be here?"  
  
"No."  
  
"You might feel better if you do."  
  
"What would you know boy?" She said, turning further away from him.  
  
"My parents are dead too. That's why I'm here."  
  
She froze and then looked over slowly to meet his eyes. She was silent a long  
moment, then asked, "How did they die?"  
  
"They got sick..." He said softly, "About three years ago...I've been here ever since."  
  
She nodded, "Mine got sick too. Mother died first....then Father..." Her voice broke,  
"I didn't want to leave the farm...."  
  
A tear made it's way down her cheek and he surprised her by catching it, "Maybe now  
neither of us will be lonely." He said it cautiously, almost as a question.  
  
She nodded, looking steadily at him, "My name's Serena..."  
  
He smiled, "I'm still going to call you Blue."  
  
She smiled back.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 


	2. Chapter 2

Careless Blue  
Chapter 2  
  
Author: Silent Moon  
e-mail: silentmoonstar@yahoo.com  
Rated: R  
Genre: Romance/Alt. Reality  
Disclaimer: standard  
  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
[I've]   
Beauty  
lays itself sweetly in my skin  
dapples lightly from within  
Ignited by a brief touch  
a Princess faerytale  
echoing true  
this truer bluer   
ivory perfect soft me  
whispers so you can't see  
she's hiding in the shadows  
she's alive inside me  
waiting  
waiting for the dream  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
  
Serena tore through the kitchen, grabbing her breakfast and rushing out the back door  
without so much as a hello to the Maid.  
  
Darien ran in just after her, "Where's Blue?"  
  
The Maid ignored him, getting his breakfast ready.  
  
"Molly?" He asked, stepping closer.  
  
She looked up, her old, work-tired face smiling at him with motherly affection,  
"If you mean Serena, she just tore out of here as though the devil were at her  
heels."  
  
"Which way did she go?" He grinned.  
  
Molly held out his muffin, "That way." She pointed, her mouth twisting wryly.  
  
He ran out as she called out, "Mind you don't make yourself sick running and eating!"  
  
Darien never heard her as he ran as fast as his legs could carry him till he spotted her,  
heading for the edge of the field again.  
  
He caught her up and poked her in the shoulder, "You're it!"  
  
She sighed though and fell to a sit, munching her muffin, "I'm too tired to  
run anymore."  
  
He sat down beside her amiably and ate his muffin too. He regarded her a moment.  
It had been nearly three weeks since she arrived. Three weeks of running and games  
and good company. It was wonderful.  
  
"I'm glad you came." He said happily.  
  
She smiled back at him, "I'm glad you're here."   
  
She swallowed her last bite of muffin, "I'm so thirsty!"  
  
He grinned and jumped up, grabbing her hand, "Come on, there's someplace I want  
to show you!"  
  
He ran all the way and she struggled to keep up, "W-wait!"  
  
They rushed down the hill, through some trees, and came to a delightful freshwater brook.  
Serena's eyes lit up, "Water! Oh heavenly!" She stooped to drink and took a long sip  
when Darien suddenly tore past her without a thing on and splashed in.  
  
"Wahoo!" He hollared happily.  
  
"What are you doing?" She asked shocked.  
  
"What does it look like I'm doing? I'm going for a swim!" He laughed, "This is  
where I take MY baths!"  
  
She raised an eyebrow at him skeptically.  
  
"Come on, are you going to get in?" He taunted, splashing water at her.  
  
"But I can't take off my clothes in front of you!"  
  
He shrugged, "I've already seen you--what does it matter?"  
  
She considered this a moment...then nodded, "Alright! A swim would be lovely!"  
  
But she did go behind some rocks to take off her clothes before streaking in squealing  
madly.  
  
Splash.  
  
Then it was an all out splash war as they laughed and swam together.  
  
It was the next in a long line of traditions. The Count was away and wouldn't be  
back until shortly before Serena turned sixteen. That left many months for Darien  
and Serena to enjoy their friendship.   
  
And enjoy it they did.  
  
They ran from the water and threw on their clothes before Darien dragged Serena off to  
the stable to teach her horse-back riding.  
  
She squealed in delight, "Oh! Mother and Father would never let me!"  
  
Melvin, the old stable keeper, laughed as Darien helped Serena unsteadily on and  
showed her how to hold the reins and lead the horse. Then he got a horse and off they  
went!  
  
Molly and another Maid watched from the window,  
"They've become fast friends haven't they?"  
  
Molly smiled, "Indeed. Let them enjoy it. I'd rather this than have something  
romantic spring up between them--that would make things difficult when the Count  
returns."  
  
"Speaking of which, we should start tutoring the girl in her manners..."  
  
Molly nodded, "We'll start next week."  
  
And so, the following week, Molly caught hold of Serena before she could run out  
of the house, "Wait just minute young lady, it's time we started tutoring you.  
You need to learn how to be a lady. You'll be married soon."  
  
Serena grimaced and Darien watched from the doorway.  
  
Molly sat her down on the couch and straightened her posture before pulling out  
some needlepoint. She turned to Darien, "You may run along lad."  
  
But Darien shook his head, his arms crossed stubbornly, "If Blue learns, then I learn."  
  
Molly chuckled at him, "You want to learn how to be a lady?"  
  
Serena watched him with wide eyes.  
  
"If she has to, than I will too."  
  
And he was graced with a smile from Serena that made it all worthwhile. Which was a  
good thing since he pricked his fingers quite dreadfully learning needle point.  
  
But he worked hard and that made her work hard--and that made things easier on the Maids  
and they were very grateful to Darien for it. He got many extra cookies for his troubles.  
  
But he balanced it out by teaching Serena 'boy things' like how to properly ride  
a horse and how to fight.   
  
Molly watched them wrestle in the mud, laughing and carrying on, one afternoon in late  
August.  
  
The other Maid came over, "The summer is almost over--the Count will be home soon."  
  
"And Serena will turn sixteen." Molly said sadly. The girl was still far too young at  
heart to marry. And it would be hard for her and for Darien to understand the difference  
it made.  
  
"Aye, she's no more ready to marry then when she came though. She'll find it difficult."  
  
Molly nodded and the two women exchanged glances.  
  
"Well, the Count is away so much, hopefully it won't be too hard on her."  
  
It was the only consoling thing to be said.  
  
The other Maid nodded and watched Darien, "He's gotten quite tall over the summer--he'll  
soon be a man."  
  
"He's nearly sixteen himself..."  
  
"They still play like children though."  
  
"I'm glad."  
  
"So am I."  
  
  
And indeed, though Darien had embarked on the ganglier part of his teens, and Serena  
had blossomed out into a woman, neither seemed to notice. They wrestled and ran  
and horse-back rode and then Serena would be stuffed into some stiff, starched dress   
against her will and Darien would do needlepoint with her and they would cook. They never  
spent a moment apart--in fact, everytime a thunder storm struck, Serena snuck into his  
room and sought the comfort of his presence to make it through--though he teased  
her terribly about it.  
  
Darien finally pinned her as they wrestled and realized they were both covered in mud.  
He laughed down at her face, "Covered in mud--just like when I met you."  
  
She stuck out her tongue at him, "Watch your mouth boy!" She teased.  
  
He jumped up, "Let's go wash off--I'm too hot anyway!"  
  
She joined in, "Hurray!"   
  
And together they ran down to the well used brook. Darien dove in first, leaving his  
clothes in a heap on some rocks before running in and Serena still changed behind the rock  
before running in after him.  
  
They laughed and splashed and chased one another.  
  
"Gotcha!"  
  
"No you didn't!"  
  
"Yes I did!"  
  
To which Darien replied by growling--something his deeper voice did quite well now.  
He dove under and headed for her feet.  
  
She squealed trying to see him under the water but it was too late by the time she  
found him. He took her down by the ankles as she screamed bloody murder.  
  
He came up laughing, "Now who's got who? Hmmm?"  
  
To which she responded by tackling him and throwing him over backwards in the water.  
He slipped and took her down with him though so that her body pressed against his--and  
rather than the usual shove-back response he always gave her--another one took over.  
One he was completely unfamiliar with.  
  
He stood up quickly as though to dispel it and found himself standing against her, her  
slim arms wrapped about him still. And though the water was cold he suddenly felt  
very warm--and did not wish to let go...in fact he instinctively pulled her closer  
as the feeling grew stronger.   
  
Her eyes widened curiously as she felt his breathing become staggered and hot against her   
shoulder. He pulled back, breath still raspy to look curiously at her--as though she might  
explain what was happening to him.  
  
But instead, her wide eyes and slightly flushed cheeks made the reaction even stronger  
and one hand suddenly moved to caress her face as he leaned down close--so close she  
thought he might kiss her. She thought she felt his lips at her neck but she couldn't  
be sure.   
  
But he pressed her against him tightly and she suddenly felt something hard press against  
her. Her eyes widened further--if possible. What was happening? Why was everything  
so warm and what...what was that?  
  
She squirmed a bit trying to figure out exactly what had happened to him so that he was  
pressed so hard against her and heard him take in a sharp breath.  
  
And it was then, as her body unconsciously rubbed against him that he finally realized  
what was happening between them and jerked back as though burnt.  
  
"I'm sorry!" He blurted, still breathing hard.  
  
She looked curiously at him, "Sorry for what?"   
  
For although the experience had been strange, it had not been unpleasant. The way  
he stroked her face, the feel of him close--more than a hug--and even the strange  
hardness of his body suddenly, it all simply made her want to get closer. She   
trusted him completely and feared nothing. She also knew nothing about love-making.  
  
He stared oddly at her a moment.  
  
She took a step closer and he took one back, "It felt...nice." She confessed  
without shame, "Was it...was it wrong?" She saw the sudden fear in his eyes  
and it made her afraid too.  
  
"Yes. Yes it was." He stumbled from the water, flushed with embarassment and into  
his clothes quickly.  
  
She hurried after him and threw on her dress, struggling to catch him as he hurried out  
to the field and then stopped, fists clenched.  
  
She came up beside him quietly, "I don't understand."  
  
He shook his head, "I know. But, we mustn't....be that way again..." He looked  
straight at her, "Maybe we shouldn't swim together anymore."  
  
He saw the flash of hurt in her eyes.  
  
"I'm not angry with you...and you've done nothing wrong--I have. We simply  
can't anymore--okay?"  
  
She looked at the sincerity in his eyes and nodded, "Alright...but we're still friends  
right?"  
  
He smiled, "Of course!"  
  
She threw her arms about his neck in a great bear hug, "Good!"  
  
Then she did something she had not done since her parents were alive. She buried  
her face gently in his shoulder and hugged him tight, "I love you Darien." She said  
with childish affection.  
  
He smiled, and then frowned as his body betrayed him once again, "I-I love you too Blue."  
He sucked in a breath, "Can you let go now?"  
  
She felt it again, as he held her tight and had the grace to blush, "S-sorry....is that  
bad?"  
  
"I wish it was!" He groaned as he let himself fall over backwards on the ground.  
  
She giggled and sat beside him, "It's strange....how come it never happened before?"  
  
He shook his head, "I'm getting older..."  
  
She nodded.  
  
"So are you." He pointed out, "I really shouldn't see you naked anymore."  
  
She smiled, "But it's you. I don't mind."  
  
"I know, but it's the right thing to do."  
  
"Alright, I guess."  
  
There was a long pause.  
  
"Darien?"  
  
"Yes?"  
  
"Does it...hurt?"  
  
"BLUE! Can we PLEASE stop talking about it!"  
  
"Can't you just answer that one question? Pleeeeeeeease?"  
  
He groaned, "Alright alright! No, it doesn't hurt."  
  
"What does it feel like?"  
  
"BLUE! I'm NOT answering any more questions!!!!!"  
  
She sighed, "Fine fine." Her eyes narrowed, "Baby." She muttered.  
  
"I heard that!"  
  
She stuck out her tongue at him and he laughed.  
  
"Ask me something else instead Blue."  
  
"Alright, what do you want to be when you grow up?"  
  
He sighed, "I wanted to be a writer, but I have a feeling my God Father's going  
to send me away to be a Soldier--once I'm old enough."  
  
"What? Send you away! I don't want you to go away!" She cried in distress.  
  
"Relax! It won't be for a long time--you might be married with babies by then! You  
won't be lonely!"  
  
She laughed at that, "I can't imagine having babies!"  
  
He laughed too, "I'll bet you have MILLIONS!"  
  
"I will not!"  
  
"Will too!"  
  
She threw some grass at him and then grew serious, "You know, I always wanted to   
be a singer. I love singing. I even know some piano!"  
  
"There's a piano in the main room--will you play for me sometime?" He asked lazily  
chewing on a long piece of grass.  
  
She giggled, "Maybe...what if you don't like my singing?"  
  
He grinned, "Then I'll make fun of you and call you Crow-Girl!"  
  
She frowned, "That's not very nice!"  
  
He paused thoughtfully, "No...I think I still like 'blue' better. I'll stick   
with that."  
  
She swatted his dark hair playfully. She looked down at his legs, "You're a lot taller  
now. And you talk differently."  
  
"What do you mean?"  
  
She tried to imitate his baritone, "You talk like this..."  
  
He laughed at her antics, "Is THAT what I sound like?"  
  
She laughed, "Yes!"  
  
They were silent awhile before Serena said oh-so-softly, "If you go away, will  
you write me?"  
  
He smiled, "Sure--every day! It'll be good practice for when I'm a real writer!"  
  
She smiled, then lay down beside him, "I'm sure you could be a great writer!"  
  
He leaned his head affectionately against hers, "Thanks Blue..."  
  
The sound of a Carriage broke their reverie and they both jumped up. Molly came rushing  
out hollaring, "Hurry! Serena! Come in! The Count is home early!"  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 


	3. Chapter 3

Careless Blue  
Chapter 3  
  
Author: Silent Moon  
e-mail: silentmoonstar@yahoo.com  
Rated: R  
Genre: Romance/Alt. Reality  
Disclaimer: standard  
  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
sunrise burns my fortress down crumbling to the ground  
i found my arrow my lightening spark buried in my heart  
  
firecracker lightening seed it was always in me  
  
this is how  
you made my heart a hunter  
jenifer mclaren  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
  
Darien watched in a mad blur as Molly ripped Serena from his company and rushed  
her down the hall. It was after his God Father greeted him and sat with him  
in the lounge for an afternoon drink, that she re-emerged.  
  
The Count was chatting with Darien about his travels and gave him a book he  
bought for the boy while away.   
  
And then Serena came in, Molly at the head, "My Lord, here is your Lady."  
  
A stranger walked into the room.  
  
A stranger with startling blue eyes.  
  
Molly had her in yet another stiff, starched dress, but this one was beautiful.  
Her hair was all tucked up in a pretty bun, and she had make-up on. She smelled  
faintly of flowers or perfume...but most startling of all, she was a woman.  
  
A beautiful woman. Darien caught his breath.  
  
She managed a curtsey for him but Darien caught the rebellious tint to her eyes  
and noticed a cookie in her pocket--the price for her gesture. He muffled a laugh.  
  
The Count stood and Serena got her first good look at him--and gave a start. The  
dreadful man from her parent's party some months before...they hadn't liked him and  
neither had she. They had refused his request for her hand--saying she was too  
young, but they promised her she would never wed him.  
  
Now here she was! And there was no where else to go!  
  
She looked him over once again. He was much older than her--possibly forty! He  
was a tall, heavy-set, dark-haired man with gaudy clothes and jewelery. A rich man  
who could afford whatever he pleased--and that included women.  
  
But he did smile kindly at her, and kissed her hand gently.  
  
"Hello my dear. Don't you look lovely--just as I remember. Come, sit down,  
I have a present for you."  
  
The present was a fine diamond necklace that he fastened carefully about her neck.  
  
"I bought that for you in China."  
  
"Thank you." She said softly, looking at it strangely.   
  
Darien watched in silence.  
  
"Are you sixteen yet my love?" He smiled sweetly at her.  
  
She shook her head, "Not for another week...my Lord."  
  
His smiled widened, "Then I shall stay on for a week shan't I?"  
He laughed heartily, "Molly! Prepare a fancy dinner for us!"  
  
The dinner proved dreadfully silent. Only the Count spoke heartily. He talked  
for hours of his travels and company. And never once did he ask what Darien  
or Serena had done in the months since her arrival.  
  
Then he whisked Serena away to the sitting room, leaving Darien to take his new  
book to the study and stare at the same page for many hours. He frowned thinking  
of the Count and Serena. She was too young to be a wife. And something was   
bothering him--he couldn't put his finger on what it was.  
  
Molly came in then, with milk and cookies for him. She sat them on the table   
and then took a seat beside him. Running a kind hand through his hair, she gave  
him a gentle hug, "You're a good boy Darien. You'll soon be a man."  
  
She smiled at him, "Do you still want to be a writer?"  
  
He nodded and then managed a small smile for her. Molly had taught him to read  
and write so that he could fulfill that dream.  
  
"Is the book giving you trouble?"  
  
"No," He said frowning, "My thoughts are."  
  
He paused a moment, "Molly?"  
  
"Yes?"  
  
He was silent a long moment.  
  
"Isn't...isn't Blue too young to marry? I mean, God Father is so much older  
than she...doesn't that make it wrong?"  
  
Molly contemplated how honest she could be with him before speaking, "It makes  
it feel wrong, I know. But no, he is allowed to marry her, and she has no  
choice really--she has no where else to go."  
  
He frowned deeper and folded his arms crossly.  
  
Molly smiled, "The Count will be gone again soon enough. He's barely home. Then  
you and Serena can chum together again--alright?"  
  
He nodded but there was still some lingering unease that would not dissipate.  
  
  
Meanwhile Serena sat stiffly on the sofa beside the Count. He smiled at her  
innocent face.  
  
"Did you know Serena, that you will be my fifth wife?"  
  
Serena's eyes widened, she was speechless.  
  
"Perhaps you will give me a son?"  
  
She thought of Darien teasing her about having millions of babies and struggled  
not to laugh. She must not appear silly in front of the Count--the Maid's had  
explained to her. She must be silent and still and only speak when spoken  
to. It was dreadfully boring though--and she missed Darien terribly.  
  
She knew she did not want to marry the Count--but she had no choice. If she  
ran away she might starve--and worse, she might never see Darien again.  
That was unthinkable. He was the one person--besides the kindly Maids--that  
she loved and cherished in this world.   
  
So she would be the Count's wife. He seemed to travel alot--so hopefully he  
would not be home often.  
  
She looked over at his aged face and studied it briefly. He might once have  
been a fairly handsome man--but no more. He merely seemed old. She knew  
he was allowed to touch and kiss her--but she did not want him to.  
  
He moved closer suddenly and leaned down to kiss her and she instinctively jerked  
away.  
  
"I-I do not wish to be kissed." She said carefully.  
  
He started to frown but then stopped.   
  
"May I kiss you on the cheek then?" He asked gently.  
  
She nodded slowly. She didn't want him to, but she felt guilty when he was  
obviously trying to be kind.  
  
He kissed her cheek and then her neck, whispering in a voice suddenly thick,  
"I cannot wait until we are married."  
  
And Serena felt a pang of something--unease--why was that?  
  
  
The week passed swiftly as the Maids prepared Serena's trouseau and baked  
a tall cake. The Count spent all his time with Serena, chattering her ears  
off and boring her to tears--trying to steal the occasional kiss but more  
often than not carrying her to bed after she'd fallen asleep listening to him  
late into the night.  
  
He would chuckle as he passed Molly, "Put her to sleep again."   
  
Molly would manage a smile, but then look over at Darien's wide eyes watching  
it all.  
  
He sulked in the library, reading his book until she began sewing Serena's dress.  
Then he insisted on helping--using his oddly learned needlepoint to carefully  
stich her sleeves and train for her.  
  
Molly and the other Maid watched him with something akin to awe.  
  
Serena passed by the kitchen while they sewed, being led by the Count on yet  
another walk and talk. She wore another pretty dress and fancy bun...her shoulders  
were slumped in defeat however--until she spotted Darien. Then her entire  
posture changed as she grinned out at him, grinding to a halt and making the  
Count actually stop what he was saying.  
  
He mistook her glee to be over her dress and pulled her away, "Come along my  
dear, you're not to see that till it's done." He said laughing.  
  
She made a quick face at Darien, whose eyes lit up and he stuck out his  
tongue at her in response. But she smiled as she followed his fingers  
to find he was helping sew her dress.  
  
Then she was yanked away by the Count.  
  
  
  
The Wedding ceremony was strange. Held in the study with just the Maids and Darien  
present along with the Minister. Darien had been stuffed into formal wear--very  
much against his will, and tugged at his merciless collar with rebellious anger.  
  
The Count stood in his Sunday best, a broad grin across his face.  
  
Then Serena swept up the aisle in her pretty white dress and veil--clutching the  
roses Darien had picked for her.  
  
And Darien's mouth hung open. His chum was suddenly an angel all in white.  
Nothing could have prepared him for the sight--not even seeing her dressed up  
a week ago.  
  
It had happened so slowly...so deftly...this change in the way his eyes saw  
her...in how is body reacted to her....now it began to come home.  
  
She was beautiful.  
  
But he saw in her eyes, the one thing that tapped her femininity back to girlhood.  
  
Innocence.  
  
She was still Careless Blue. Still a wreckless, unbidding girl. And for now  
that was what he loved best about her.  
  
So he watched her walk up and reluctantly exchange vows with his God Father. Watched  
as he stooped to kiss her and she pulled a bit of a grimace.  
  
The Maid's hadn't any time to explain what was expected of her as a wife. And it wasn't  
until after the wedding supper, when they were eating the cake and the Count had  
become very drunk. Too drunk. That realization hit Darien.  
  
The one thing sitting badly with him.  
  
The Count bent to kiss Serena's neck wrecklessly and her face betrayed it.  
  
He grabbed Molly by the arm as she brought out more wine, his eyes wide,  
face pale.  
  
"Molly!"  
  
She looked at him in surprise, "What is it dear?"  
  
He hurried her into the kitchen, "Did you speak with Serena about being a wife?"  
  
"What do you mean?"  
  
He became panicked, "She doesn't know! She doesn't know anything!"  
  
Molly began to catch on, "Surely her parents explained to her--?"  
  
"No!"  
  
The other Maid sucked in a breath, "Oh no...you mean she has no idea what is coming  
tonight?"  
  
Darien shook his dark head fearfully.  
  
Molly shook her head as well, "And the Count is drunk..."  
Then she turned to Darien, trying to calm him, "We'll speak to her love, don't  
worry."  
  
But worry he did. The Count drank more and pawed her shamelessly before finally  
excusing himself to the bathroom.  
  
Then Molly whisked Serena into the kitchen and did her best to explain the birds and  
the bees to her before the Count returned looking for her.  
  
Unfortunately such a brief explanation only served to terrify the girl  
and Darien watched in horror as the Count led her upstairs, her eyes wide as  
saucers gazing after her.  
  
His own stared painfully back with helplessness swimming in their grave depths.  
  
Their eyes met and then she was gone behind the bedroom door.  
  
Darien did not sleep that night. Sitting in bed in horror, worrying for her.  
~She's just a girl...just a girl...~  
  
And when a sudden, pained cry broke the silence, he balled up his fists and buried his face  
in his pillow in anger and frustration.  
  
The night seemed to stretch to forever...  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 


	4. Chapter 4

Careless Blue  
Chapter 4  
  
Author: Silent Moon  
e-mail: silentmoonstar@yahoo.com  
Rated: R  
Genre: Romance/Alt. Reality  
Disclaimer: standard  
  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
I did not notice the tear  
Until it had slithered  
Like a poisonous snake  
Down my cheek  
And splashed silently  
Into the water below,  
Sending my image  
Into a dozen rings of sadness  
Until the sky itself could be seen  
Rolling away from me  
With unbearable hatred.  
  
alicia blade  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
  
Darien was reluctant to go to breakfast the next morning. He forced his legs  
to carry him to the kitchen and Molly pressed a muffin into his numb hand.  
  
Serena stood in a plain dress with a shawl wrapped round her and for the first  
time Darien could recall, she looked fragile.  
  
Her back was to him, but her posture was sad and despondant.   
  
The Count whisked through then, "Well everyone, I'm off! I shan't be back for  
several weeks!"  
  
He gave Serena a pat to the rump, "Take care till I come home!"  
  
And he watched her shudder in pain, his fist squeezing the muffin to pieces.  
Serena waited till the front door shut behind the Count before slowly, slowly  
slipping off her wedding ring and saying oh-so-softly, "I'm not hungry. I think   
I'll go for a walk..."  
  
She started towards the door, slowly, limping as though in great pain and Darien's  
dismay turned to rage. Molly watched it light in his eyes and he made to run after the  
Count before she caught him, "Don't do anything foolish!"  
  
He struggled and would have broken free if she had not added, "Go to her, she needs  
your comfort."  
  
He turned to see her limping across the field before collapsing to her knees, burying  
her face in her hands.  
  
He hurried out after her.  
  
When he reached her he sank to his knees and reached over to gently touch her  
shoulders.  
  
She pulled away, "Go, I'm ashamed for you to see me this way...."  
  
But he took her in his arms and stroked her back softly, kissing her forehead.  
She cried into his chest, "He hurt me..."  
  
He winced and held her tightly, willing her pain to be his instead. He was silent  
a long moment as she cried with abandon into his warm arms. Then he lifted  
her up in and carried her away towards the brook.  
  
She looked wide-eyed at him as though she would speak but then buried her face in his  
shoulders, arms about his neck, letting him take her.  
  
Molly and the other Maid watched from the window, clutching each other, pale and  
sad.  
  
Overnight she had lost her girlhood....and she could never go back...she was a  
woman now.  
  
  
Darien carried her down to the brook and then stood her gently on her feet before  
unbuttoning her dress.  
  
She froze and pulled back, "No..."  
  
He frowned at her curiously.  
  
"I don't want you to see me...like this..."  
  
He ignored her protest and gently pulled the dress down--and gasped. Her skin  
was bruised...red marks on her arms and back...  
  
He pulled her close once again and gently stroked her...lightly--so light she   
couldn't believe how gentle he was.  
  
Then she heard him suck in a sharp breath and realized...he was crying.  
  
She looked up quite suddenly and caught the tears trailing down his summer-brown  
cheeks with wonderment clear across her face...she gently brushed them with her  
fingers.   
  
Then he carried her into the brook, lowering her slowly as she winced at the  
touch of the cold water. When she was in and laid gently over his arm, he  
tore a piece of his shirt off for a cloth.  
  
"Your shirt..."  
  
"I'll get another shirt." He said with something never present in his tone before.  
Something that made her silent.  
  
He stroked gently at her, rubbing her arms and legs.  
  
She watched his face. Just a week before they'd been laughing and splashing and  
then he's said they weren't to do this anymore. But things were different now.  
They had changed forever. And this wasn't about playing...it was about Darien  
caring for her.  
  
He slipped the cloth very cautiously down her stomach...and then between her legs,  
watching her face carefully.  
  
She winced and shut her eyes briefly, sucking in a sharp breath on a pained sound.  
He softened his touch, lighter and lighter until it didn't hurt, but soothed.  
Then he stroked her carefully as she kept her eyes shut tight.  
  
Looking at her now, vulnerable and hurting in his arms he was filled with emotions  
too strong to name. Emotions he hadn't known he possessed--or felt for her until  
now.   
  
He gathered her up carefully and helped her dress before carrying her back towards  
the house. She struggled out of his arms though and walked most of the way, her  
slender arm over his shoulders for support.  
  
When they came within a few steps of the house though, she stumbled and he picked  
her up again, carrying her in where Molly and the other Maid waited.  
  
"Let us take her lad! We'll look after her!"  
  
"No!" He said suddenly, pulling her away, "I'll take care of her!"  
  
And there was fire in his eyes.  
  
Molly touched his arm gently, "Lad, carry her into her bedroom....we have some  
salves and creams that will make her feel better...they'll help."  
  
He looked into her kindly eyes and she watched the pain threaten to overwhelm him.  
He nodded and carried her in.  
  
Then he left and crumpled to a heap on the floor outside her door, burying his face  
in his arms.  
  
Molly came out a while later and found him thus, she bent and caught him in her  
arms, where he wept for the first time since he was a boy.  
  
Neither said anything though. Words were inadequate.   
  
She took him to the kitchen and got him a hot drink before sending him to bed.  
But she found him later that night, sleeping on the floor outside her door  
and could only cover him with a blanket.  
  
  
Serena found him there the next morning and bent to wake him, smiling.  
His dark eyes opened to meet hers warily and then he snapped to attention,   
"How do you feel?"  
  
"A little better."   
  
But she was still limping and he carried her to breakfast.  
  
"You can't carry me everywhere!"  
  
"Yes I can."  
  
And that was the end of that.  
  
He carried her back down to the brook after breakfast and washed her again, gently,  
carefully, as though she might break.  
  
Then he carried her home and sat her in the library to read with him.  
  
"What shall I read?" She asked as he sat her on the sofa and wrapped a blanket round  
her.  
  
"This one." He said turning around from his searching and handing it to her.  
  
"Wuthering Heights?" She asked dubiously, reading the faded title.  
  
"You'll like it." He said wryly.  
  
Then he settled in beside her and read as she lay her head on his shoulder and   
started her own book.  
  
Molly brought them cookies and milk...and even sandwiches later so they didn't  
have to move.   
  
Then he carried her to bed and Molly and the other Maid helped her and gave  
her salves to sooth her skin.  
  
Serena lay silently that night as she listened to Molly argue Darien back to bed  
and away from her door.  
  
She stared out at the stars and thought deeply. She was a wife now, and her girlhood  
had been ripped away by the Count. His drunken, heavy-handed love making had been   
far more terrifying than what Molly had hurredly explained in the kitchen.  
  
Could she never again run and play with Darien? Was that ended forever? And if so,  
what would take it's place?  
  
She finally dozed off fitfully.  
  
Darien carried her down to the brook the next morning and bathed her gently, stroking  
her still-burnt skin with a kind touch.  
  
But as she stumbled away from the brook and fell into his arms, a wave of bitterness  
washed over her, "I hate him." She muffled into his chest, "I don't want him to  
be my husband."  
  
And she meant it. It occurred to her quite suddenly however, as she looked up into  
Darien's dark, serious eyes, that if she wanted anyone for her husband it was him.  
  
And that was when she remembered their brief encounter...it seemed so long ago.  
She made a decision as they hobbled back to the house. For she suddenly realized, that  
if she were no longer a girl....than her love for him was no longer a child's love either.  
  
  
  
Darien carried her down to the water everyday and washed her. He was very silent. He  
carried her until she stopped limping altogether and then took her on careful walks,  
watching her warily.   
  
They read together and ate together, but there was no playing, or laughing, or even smiling.  
And that broke her heart.  
  
She waited until her body was her own again before acting on her decision.  
  
The next morning, some two weeks after the Count had left, as they walked towards the  
brook she stopped him.  
  
"Darien?"  
  
He turned to face her, "Yes?" His voice was so soft and she realized he'd barely  
spoken at all these past weeks.  
  
She took a determined step closer, "That day at the brook...."  
She watched recognition colour his cheeks and continued, "W-was that how it's supposed  
to be?"  
  
His eyes met hers then, in a kind of tortured agony and sympathy and truth,  
"Yes." He said hoarsely, knowing at that moment, how much he truly loved her.  
  
Her eyes looked at him, bluer than they'd ever been, "Show me?"  
  
She watched shock register across his face and he opened his mouth but nothing came out.  
  
"Please?" She added, holding out her arms.  
  
He looked at her a long moment, the question in his eyes. Did she really want to  
betray her husband?  
  
But her eyes were steady and assuring. And he remembered how she took off the ring.  
Her hands were bare--as though she were free.  
  
He took her slowly into his arms and held her a moment...a long moment....before shakily  
undoing her dress...for once the action was paired with the forbidden act it associated  
itself with.  
  
He slipped her dress off gently and ran his hands softly over her back, her arms...  
Then he pulled away a moment but she kept her eyes shut tight until he whispered softly  
in her ear, "May I kiss you?"  
  
Her eyes flew open in surprise and she opened her mouth to speak but lost her voice  
at the sight of him quite naked. Her eyes widened but she managed to regain herself.  
  
"Y-yes."  
  
He smiled softly and then leaned in, pressing his lips against hers...uncertainly at  
first and then, slowly, with more pressure, stroking and tasting her until they  
both found what pleased them.  
  
She wound her arms about him and he pulled her tight against him, murmuring something  
in the back of his throat.  
  
Then he pulled back, breathing heavily and bent to her neck till she could feel his  
breath, "May I kiss you here?"  
  
She smiled, "Yes."  
  
He pressed kisses down her throat and shoulder then stopped at her breasts,  
"And here?"  
  
She giggled, "Yes." Then gasped at the sensation.  
  
He kissed down her stomach, "And here?"  
  
She laughed outright now, "Are you going to kiss me all over?"  
  
She heard him chuckle but murmur, "Mmmhmm."  
  
He wandered lower and her breath hitched in her throat. What was this feeling?  
She instinctively moved closer as his mouth pressed kisses to her legs and her  
knees and then back up.  
  
And when he pressed one careful kiss between her legs she felt a sudden sensation  
of pleasure that made her eyes flutter shut and her breath gasp quite audibly.  
  
Darien looked up at her face and then pulled her gently down to the sand, laying  
beside her so their feet dipped into the cool water.  
  
He moved over her and kissed her again, deeply, hands in her hair as he pressed her  
back against the sand. She kissed him back but then pulled away,   
"I'm afraid." She whispered, her eyes wide.  
  
His eyes softened as he breathed heavily, desire threatening to overwhelm him,  
"I-I've never done this before....but I promise I won't hurt you--Blue."  
  
And he watched her visibly relax then and smile as she wrapped her arms around  
him, "I know...I believe you. I trust you."  
  
He came to lay over her and she parted her legs, wrapping them around his hips and  
drawing him down--this was the part she knew.  
  
He watched her face carefully as he pressed slowly in, reading her face for pleasure  
or pain. She smiled and moaned softly but then suddenly gasped out in pain so he  
stopped. And lingered. Partway in, stroking gently--feeling he'd die from the sudden  
ecstasy of it--until she softened and he felt her legs relax.  
  
And with a sudden moan of pleasure she took him all the way and his eyes fluttered  
closed with the overwhelming sensation of it.  
  
She opened her eyes and watched him, his face unguarded and alive with pleasure.  
With every stroke that made her moan he felt it too. It made her smile  
and caress his face gently.  
  
His eyes fluttered open and met hers, he leaned down and kissed her, then breathed  
softly into her neck, "I love you...Serena..."  
  
Not Blue but her real name. Her grown-up name. She smiled, "I love you too..."  
And she knew how much at that moment.  
  
His staggered breathing became gasps, "...I..I don't know how long this is going  
to last....I'm sorry...."  
  
Sorry? She nearly laughed. This was bliss.   
  
Instead she wrapped herself tighter around him and--feeling that he was holding back  
from moving any faster--pressed herself against him with a rhythm of her own.  
  
And she felt him lose control, let out a strange sound of anguish and joy mingled   
together before his body shuddered in release. And feeling it from him was  
beautiful.  
  
She held him in her arms and savored it.  
  
They lay there long moments afterwards, till they caught their breath--especially   
Darien.  
  
Then he pulled himself up on his elbows and regarded her with very tender eyes.  
He kissed her gently, over and over and she giggled, kissing him back.  
  
"Tell me again?" he asked softly.  
  
She smiled, "I love you?"  
  
"That's it..."  
  
She laughed, "I love you Darien."  
  
"I love you too." He kissed her neck and finally pulled away farther so he could  
caress her body again.  
  
She took the opportunity to tackle him over and lay on top, making him laugh.  
The sight of his smile was wonderful. She pressed the corners of his mouth comically  
with her fingers, "I was afraid you'd forgotten how!"  
  
He caught her fingertips and kissed them.  
  
Then he caught her up in his arms and cuddled her against him, with something of  
their old comraderie and a newly awakened, sensual possessiveness.  
  
They stayed that way a long time as it all sunk in. And when they finally pulled  
on their clothes to head back, they were smiling. Really smiling again.  
  
Darien leaned over and kissed her one last time and then took her hand to lead  
her back to the house.  
  
They seemed to come alive after that. Molly and the other Maid were heart-glad to   
hear them bantering and laughing in the library.  
  
And she never suspected anything. They were very careful.  
  
But nearly every morning they slipped down to the brook and made love.  
Carefully, tenderly, until they knew each other's bodies better than their own.  
Darien would lay her back and touch her so softly, whispering in her ear,  
"Is this nice?" "And this?"  
  
And by the end of the first week he was seeing her through to the end--feeling her  
softly shuddering body beneath his with a deep satisfaction.  
  
Molly never wondered until the Count returned. But as she slipped the ring quickly  
back on Serena's finger and watched the girl's lips and shoulders stiffen it was  
Darien's nearly tortured eyes watching that gave him away.  
  
The Count made no pretense and carted her shamelessly upstairs as she looked sadly  
back at Darien.  
  
He stood at the foot of the great staircase, his fists balled, before he turned  
his eyes away--unable to meet her gaze anymore.  
  
It was then that Molly first began to guess.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 


End file.
